Well, this is definitely something a little more out of my comfort zone. A personal post about my body confidence, being myself and accepting my quirks. I can definitely feel a tugging force, pulling my cards back close to my chest. I have always been myself online, I enjoy sharing what I love! However, I have always found it a little hard to delve in a bit deeper. Discussing things that weren’t always that comfortable was a struggle for me. But if there’s one thing I’ve learnt this year, it’s how important it is to love yourself. The realisation of this is something that has really taken effect on my life recently and has dramatically improved so many factors. Maybe it’s something I’ve grown into with age, or maybe I have just stopped caring about the silly things? Either way, I feel a lot better for it and just wanted to share my experience so far.
Life Does Not Wait
If there’s something you want to do, just do it. I used to put things on the back-burner because of one excuse or another. I wanted to get back into blogging for so long, but I told myself it wasn’t the right time. Why wasn’t it the right time? Deep down, I was afraid that my weight gain and lack of confidence made me not suitable, that it would make people I know notice and talk. I mean, what does that even mean? People who matter see me in person, so why would it matter if they see me in photos? I was stopping myself doing something I enjoyed because I was not letting myself be me. When you put your worries into words, you realise how minuscule they actually are. Maybe you want to take up a new hobby or learn a new skill. The only difference in doing it now, or in 5 years, is that you’ve just lost out on 5 years of doing exactly what you wanted to do.
There’s Only One You
Sounds cheesy I know, but it’s true. You have one body, and your own personality. I know it’s easy in today’s internet generation to see trends and get caught up in thinking you want to be like someone else. But that would be a damn shame! Without realising, my confidence had taken a social media sized beating. I used to not wear certain clothes that I liked because I worried it did not fit in with what’s normal in Birmingham. I thought only in London could I get away with that. Well, that got old and boring fast. A man actually came up to me the other day and told me I looked like a witch because of my fedora hat (the jokes on him, as I love all things Halloween)! But joking aside, unhappy people will always talk, but they are just that, unhappy. I wear whatever I want right now and it feels great, it’s got me out of my comfort zone and trying new styles. As for personality, If I have a pound for everytime my socially awkward mind told me “What if they think you’re weird?” I’d be a bloody millionaire. What are we even comparing ourselves to as a standard to think someone is weird? We are all weird, and weird is wonderful.
Healthier Happier Mindset
I have found that the more accepting of myself I am, the bigger the weight has lifted from my shoulders. Unnecessary doors have shut in my mind before I go to sleep at night. I used to bog myself down with thoughts that made me feel miserable, but now I’m starting to look at them in a completely different light. I used to worry about social plans, that they were going to make me gain extra weight and dislike myself more. Now, I just appreciate the good times with those people who want to spend time with me, exactly how I am. My vision of myself was a problem. I’d look at other people, all different shapes and sizes, and think how great they looked. My lack of confidence was ugly, not my skin. I stopped hiding in clothes that didn’t suit my figure and just embraced my own body. Stop comparing yourself, and learn to compliment yourself. Whether that be literally, or just by giving yourself a chance to grow. Let yourself enjoy what it is that you want to enjoy, your confidence will thank you for it!
It’s An Ongoing Journey
This is one point I must stress. Obviously, I haven’t just flicked a switch in my brain. Not everything is immediate, we all have our down days. I still have my moments, days, breakdowns. I’m still learning to love myself, more and more so every day. This year I have been very lucky to surround myself with great people. People who have made me feel both empowered and appreciated. New friends, and old, who are completely different in every way, but support each other for all of our quirks and interests. I do think this is important, to spend your time with people who make you feel good about yourself. Not only that, to also be a good person in return. Support others in their own journey, it will open up a world of new experiences! I have discovered so many different communities this year, different people with different talents and hobbies. It really does make you realise how silly it is to be afraid to embrace yourself, quirks and all. All of these little things that make us who we are. Enjoy yourself and accomplish more by doing so!